Thursday, January 18, 2007

Hortiphilia

"Someone pathologically obsessed with plants to such an extent that it interfers with normal life functions."

Symptoms

  • Can spin almost any conversation toward gardening. Example 'Yeah, I am really interested in the continental literature too, did you know that the French were amoung the first to originate the Biointensive Gardening Technique.'
  • Commenting on plants in unlikely places such as doctor's offices, romantic dinners (floral arrangements), children's birthday parties, during labour...
  • Getting joy out of corrupting others, especially children by giving them plant related children's stories. I recomment 'The Gardener.'
  • Having a drawer full of seeds, a bookshelf full of gardening books, and every available light source with green straining toward it.
  • Seeing your life as split between 'gardening' season, and that other boring one.
  • Driving down the street at 60 when you suddenly stop, back up, pull over and point out to your non gardening partner that there is a Bleeding-Heart root that had been thrown into the woods and was in bloom (scale, 40 foot trees, inside 10 foot chainlink fence 4 feet was a 10 inch plant that I managed to see) and that you just had to take some home. So you take your snow scraper and a plastic bag for the rescue. Or some other plant focused, mildy dangerous yet innovative venture.

5 comments:

Blackswamp_Girl said...

Great list--I am definitely afflicted! One thing, though... I don't know that "gardening season" ever changes. In the winter we just winter sow, and drool over catalogs, and console ourselves with cuttings and overwintering plants, etc.!

(I know... easy for me to say down here in Zone 6...)

Ottawa Gardener said...

This is true. Perhaps I should list another symptom such as suffers from SAD - spring awaiting disorder.

Gotta Garden said...

Too funny! Or maybe not funny, just plain true...lol!

GeorgiaGirl said...

I'm like Blackswamp Girl, I see gardening all year round. Here in Georgia (Zone 7), collards, pansies, chard, etc. flourish in the winter. And there are houseplants to work with and gardening catalogs to peruse and seeds to sprout in the seed sprouter. Sometimes it's too cold to go outside but that doesn't last long. And snow pea seeds have to be in the ground by the end of February.

Glacia III said...

Definitely afflicted...I've been sorting through piles of seeds happily all day while the worst winter storm of the year rages outside...or so I've heard...bahahahaha.